Be our social media intern.

This is his "excited" face.

Meet Matt The Intern.

Look at how excited Matt The Intern is to be one of the very first people holding the brand-new Wainy Days DVD.

If you were our intern you would be as lucky as he is, too. In FACT, today IS your lucky day because we need social media and graphics interns.

Here's the deal:

• *We are located in New York City, so you must be, too. Or you must be willing at least to commute into New York City on a regular basis.
• *You can receive college credit! If this is of interest to you we can do this... however...
• *Being a student is not a prerequisite. Just know that.

Here are the skills we're looking for:

• *You should be familiar with our content. Some of it. All of it. Take your pick. But you should know something about us.
• *You should have strong writing skills. Please send us links to your Twitter and Tumblr and blog. But not your Pinterest. We don't care about that...YET.
• *You should have basic Photoshop and HTML skills. Have you ever created an image for a meme? Have you posted said image to your blog without the benefit of a blog editor? Do you sometimes wish you could just hold up an animated gif in real-life situations? Fantastic. You're who we want.
• *Basic Final Cut Pro or other video editing skills are wonderful and we could definitely figure out how to use your skills effectively and creatively, but they are not necessary.

Here's what you'd be doing:

• *Hanging out on Tumblr all day.
• *Creating gifs of our content.
• *Helping us think of hashtags.
• *Photoshopping Mary Lynn Rajskub's head onto Jeremy Lin's body just because we think saying "Mary Lynn-sanity" is funny.
• *Helping to optimize all of our social media outlets aesthetically and strategically.
• *Not all of it is fun. Sometimes there is data entry. Sometimes there is heavy lifting. Sometimes there is a coffee run that needs running.

BUT you would definitely get a Wainy Days DVD. Well, probably.

Please send all inquiries to Maria [at] MyDamnChannel [dot] com.

Thanks! And may the odds be ever in your favor! (But not in a BAD Hunger Games sort of way!)

(PS: We have several videos starring Elizabeth Banks!)

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That Ain't Right

We're back!

After a short hiatus prompted by the laziness of our editor (ed. note: Sorry, dudes.) "That Ain't Right" returns!

This is where we scan Twitter for people who say "My Damn Channel" but are in no way referring to us! And through much scientific study (ed. note: There was NO scientific study.) we determined that the correct response to each tweet is "That Ain't Right!" Here we go:

Lifetime is my Damn channel

— Bitch-'Im-PootieTang (@BeccaMathers) December 19, 2011

@BeccaMathers , you are preaching to the choir. I was having a little trouble trying to fit the phrase “That Ain’t Right” into this because loving Lifetime is oh-so-very-right. Then it dawned on me, “Lifetime is MY damn channel”? Are you planning on taking Lifetime away from us all and depriving us of the sweet combination of Meredith Baxter Birney and reruns of “Unsolved Mysteries”. Take some other channel like Home and Garden or The CW. Not sharing Lifetime with the rest of us? That Ain’t Right!

I wake up watchn family feud ... Who changed my damn channel?

— Maria Redd!! (@ObeyMeBitchez) December 18, 2011

@obeyMeBitchez , our hearts go out to you, it seems like you are living a nightmare scenario. Anyone who wakes up from a nap to hear Louie Anderson yelling “Top 6 reasons to eat a sandwich!” deserves a hug. To the people who changed @obeyMeBitchez , changing the channel to a show hosted by the son of satan himself, Louie Anderson?!?! That Ain’t Right!

This Lil Grl Gone Get Enough Of Changing My Damn Channel!

— Sandie_Mariee :) (@Caremel_Beautyy) December 20, 2011

That lil grl better done gone get enough of changing your damn channel! Grl changing your channel! That ain’t right! For real though lil grl, it sounds like you need some guidance. Changing @Caremel_Beautyy ‘s channel is not the answer to solving your problems. If you need some help, we here at MyDamnChannel are more then willing to listen. If you don’t speak out your problems they will grow inside and come out as hate, that simply Ain’t Right.

This the same lil ugly friend that came in, sat his ass on the couch and changed my damn channel like he live here

— soleil wilson (@lextasy_21) December 18, 2011

@lextasy I think you need a new choice of friends. We here at MyDamnChannel are more then willing to step up and apply to take over. Unlike your last friend we are tall and handsome, only sit where we are told and would never in a million years even think of changing your channel. We also are great listeners and make a Tiramisu that is out of this world. Keeping your old and disrespectful friends around? Does he even know what a Tiramisu is? I bet he can’t tell the difference between a Ramekin and a cupcake wrapper! That Ain’t Right!

the dog jus changed my damn channel!

— iwna panda -.- (@FinesseYoNigga_) December 19, 2011

WHAT!!! @FinesseYoNigga! You have found your own personal version of Airbud! Sure, he may not be able to shoot the game winning 3 pointer or score the game winning touchdown (See “Airbud 2: Golden Receiver”) but he can change a channel! You must find a way to hone his talents otherwise they will go to waste and That Ain’t Right!

That's all for this edition of "That Ain't Right"! Will there be one more before the end of 2011? (ed. note: I promise nothing.)

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Put A Tony Danza On It

After watching Mark Malkoff's "Free Cab Rides" video, we were particularly struck by the part where Mark and his driver Sean decide to "Tony Danza" the cab.

Brilliant.

An ode to Tony Danza's turn in TAXI, sure, but why not an ode to Tony Danza in general? We're ashamed to admit that we think about Who's The Boss? on almost a daily basis. Like, who WAS the boss? That question has boggled us since we were seven. So, we thought, let's Tony Danza some sh*t.

(Jeff Bezos "Put A Tony Danza" on the Kindle Fire!)


(Wanna make How To Make It In America a better show?
"Put A Tony Danza On It!")

Here, maybe you wanna "Put A Tony Danza On It" yourself?

Go for it! You know how on Portlandia they "Put A Bird On It?" Well, maybe the rest of us should "Put A Tony Danza On It." Maybe you want to help a new generation embrace a beloved 80's sitcom star due to an obscure but indefatigable movement to put his likeness in unexpected places!

Or, you know, maybe you're just bored and you don't suck at Photoshop. Either of those reasons could lead to a perfectly acceptable decision to "Put A Tony Danza On It." Just be sure to let us know if you do.

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Yes. We Can Confirm That Jonah Hill Is Skinny

(Image via)

Jonah Hill is skinny.

Perhaps you've heard? He's in a new movie called Moneyball and he's been making the promotional rounds and we're here to tell you that the rumors are true: he's super-slimmed down.

You see, it just so happens that your humble My Damn Channel blogger went to a professional baseball game last week and saw him in person when he threw out the first pitch:

(Image via @Athletics)

It is a very different look from his Wainy Days role:

But just like we told our mom when she asked, "Is that the same guy from your Wainy Days show? Is he a good friend of yours or something? Should you go down to the field and say 'hi' to him?" We'll tell you the truth:

"Yes it's the same guy."

"No, we're not good friends."

"NO, MOM, WE'RE NOT GOING DOWN TO THE FIELD TO SAY 'HI.'"

But that last part was mostly just because security wouldn't let us.

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How To Be A Vlogger: Lesson One

So you want to know how to be a vlogger.

Daily Grace is pretty good at vlogging so you think we might know a thing or two about it, right?

Fine. We're going to tell you all of our secrets. But only one at a time.

Lesson One: Let everyone know this is your very first vlog and you're not sure what to say.

Like so:

As you can see in this "My First Vlog Supercut" (courtesy our sister blog, Slacktory), telling everyone it's your first time (what?) will make you seem humble and adorable. No one likes the rookie who hits a grand slam in his first at-bat! Well, everyone pretends they like him, but inside everyone is actually seething with jealousy. So, self-deprecation is totally the way to go! Also, you now have a built-in excuse for doing a terrible job. Also, I made a baseball analogy! Whoa.

Make sure you come back next Friday for Lesson Two...

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Come At Me, Bro Speak!

Your new favorite blog, Slacktory, did you the generous favor of translating Facebook's confusing and cumbersome Terms of Service into "Bro Speak" so that everyone can understand the rules, even if one happens to be wearing a baseball cap askew on one's head.

Here's an excerpt on Privacy, a subject that seems to get many Facebook users up in arms:

We give lots of fucks about your privacy, so we wrote this. Read it, so you know what the fuck we’re going to do with the shit you post, so you’re not all “Facebook, I had no idea!” when your shit is in our press releases. That way you know the deal when you’re deciding what to post.

Nice work, bro. Now that we're finally able to understand Facebook's Terms of Service, there will be NO CHANCE that we'll ever be upset with them for using in some public and vaguely nefarious manner any of the information or data that we've given them voluntarily! Hooray!

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We love LA!

Anyone happen to be at the Dodgers-Diamondbacks game last Friday night at Dodger Stadium?  Did you see our name up in lights? (Yes, we know what attendance is like these days at Dodger Stadium, so we're going to guess that not many of you did.) 

We're in LA!

We're here to take the winners of the Versailles Sweepstakes to meet Patricia Heaton and David Hunt!

We're using exclamation marks at the end of each sentence because we really are THAT EXCITED about everything!

Stay tuned for more pictures of the winners and their prize...

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It's Wednesday. Time for Mortal Kombat.

It's Wednesday. Here's something to help you get over the hump:



The Mortal Kombat: Legacy finale!

Fighting! Cyborgs! Sorcerers!  The final episode kicks so much ass we don't know what to do bur stare slack-jawed at our screen and make gifs of our favorite fight scenes.




Watch it now and make your Wednesday kick a little more ass, too.

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Wish I Knew How to Quidditch You

A young George Costanza?

Maybe you've seen the ads on billboards, in bus shelters, or projected onto the insides of your eyelids.  Maybe you've seen Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, or the Other One making the rounds on the talk show circuit.  Or maybe you need only to consult your very own "Mug Life" abdomen tattoo to be reminded that today--yes, today!--marks the release of the final Harry Potter movie, Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows, Part Two: Stagnetti's Revenge.

Yes, after a decade's worth of yeoman-like service at the multiplex, it's finally come time for this iteration of Harry Potter to power down, be put out to stud, and other such mixed metaphors.  It's a bittersweet day for fans, but hopefully the release of the final film in the franchise will at least provide the answers to some longstanding mysteries, like "What's the deal with the smoke monster?",  "Whatever happened to that Russian Paulie and Christopher let escape into the pine barrens?" and "So did A and X meet at this place last year, or what?"

Okay, so maybe I don't know anything about the Harry Potter franchise.  But our very own Daily Grace does...

And today, she bids a tearful adieu to the Boy Who Lived.  But if you want to avoid the waterworks, you can check in on Ms. Helbig in happier times, watching Part 1 of Deathly Hallows, or over on her Tumblr, wherein she ups her Hogwarts cosplay game considerably.

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Gigi Talk On Telephone?

It's Wednesday, and that means there's another episode of Gigi for you.  And what is that foreign rapscallion up to this time?  Well today, Gigi will be dabbling in the game of telephone and the game of love - though, I'm not sure if he knows he is doing either.  What a lovable guy!

So dig in and check out this slam-bang episode!  And if you're new to the series, watch how it all began HERE.

O-kay?  O-KAY!!!

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